There is a traitor deep within me
And he desires my flesh.
Oh the damage he has caused!
Oh the treason and deceit of my own soul!
For so long my soul has been tormented
By the wanton desires of my heart.
For so long I have hindered the Spirit
And damaged lives including my own.
I diseased myself and made myself ill,
I thought I could ease the pain
With the Spiritual pain pills
Of Music and Forgiveness
When the root had not been destroyed.
It kept festering,
Simply covered up and overlooked
Because at heart,
It wanted to stay hidden.
I haven’t let You into the place where You belong,
Where my secrets are well-hidden,
Far beyond the reaches of my mind.
My heart did not want to follow You,
It yearned for the desires of the flesh.
While it took me too long to realize its deadly scheme-
To satisfy my own deep desires
Masking itself as light.
While I worked night and day
Trying to figure out the problem,
It appeared as one of my own.
But it was a wolf in sheep’s clothing
Mauling my soul day after day
Leaving me bleeding and crying out for help.
Just when I think i catch it,
I learn that I just killed my own.
But this shifting shadow has no place
Where it can hide from the Father of lights.
Its deeds were exposed
Naked and out in the open,
Raw to the touch and ugly.
Only one like the Healer
Can stifle the desires are set against Him.
He not only can clean and heal the wounds,
But He can transform this decrepit space
Into a place worth living,
So beautiful and pristine,
Fit for the Savior.
He deserves nothing less than my all I can give
Where my life for Him I’m meant to live.
Purify my heart that is set against You,
Make its desires Your desires.
Change what is within
And forgive my sin
That I’ve kept so hidden,
Even from myself.
Fix what is Yours
And make me a vessel honorable to You,
Who is worthy of all my praise
To whom I serve with my life
Who needs nothing from me,
But still shows me mercy and compassion
And loves me even when I don’t love Him back,
When I in fact trample His name
And spit in His face.
A love, mercy, and grace so deep
That yearns me my soul be yours to keep
Through all of my days
To such a faithful God,