Do – do I do not?

As I talked about in my previous post, my word for this year is do. Simply do.

I’ve already run into a snag, though. I’m pretty bad at it. I had to come up with a pretty terrible title to poke fun at myself. It’s loosely connected to a terrible pun about Yoda from star wars phrase “do or do not, there is no try. ”

All silliness and making fun of myself aside, I’m already starting off this year with one of my biggest flaws. I start out strong for maybe a day with some great ideas I’m stoked about… And then I peter out. I find reasons not to accomplish the things I mean to.

“I’m too tired. I have to decompress from work. I’m too busy. I’ll do it later. I’ve waited this long, so I’ll get depressed about taking so long and continue my pattern.”

I have a litany of reasons why I won’t “do.” I can’t keep giving myself the space to allow that. I thought my first post about my word for the year was going to touch on fears and some ideas, but I haven’t gotten there yet.

It actually sat in my drafts for three weeks completed except this line. 🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️

Jesus, I need you. I’ve treated you like a genie who could just fix me and my problems. Can You draw close to me as I learn to draw close to you to just be with… You. I’m so bad about having other motives, even when I’m not trying to have other motives. I’m broken and messy, Jesus. I need to align with You and learn to do what I set out to accomplish instead of procrastinating my life away. Thank You for Your grace as I learn what doing is this year.

Amen. Let it be so.

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